Hello from Starbucks! My wireless is out so I had to take my work day across the street, and TALK ABOUT A BLESSING. Let me preface what I’m about to say by letting you all know that between Serial, Making a Murderer and the mystery novels I’ve been listening to on Audible during long runs, I am on a total true crime kick. In my head, I’m basically Olivia Benson.
Ok so about twenty minutes ago I walk into Starbucks and start setting my computer up at a table next to two unassuming men. At first glance it appeared the older one was interviewing the younger one for a job, which is a normal occurrence in coffee shops. Naturally, because I respect others’ privacy, I immediately start eavesdropping. I was hoping to hear some entertaining exchanges (nothing like an awkwardly butchered job interview response to get my juices flowin’!) but got something even better.
“Does he have any foreign contacts that you know of? Any connections that could make leaving the country easy?”
Hmmm this isn’t a job interview; the older man is asking the younger one about someone else.
“Describe his temperament. Any history of anger issues–bar fights, issues with girlfriends, stuff like that?”
OMG. OMGOMGOMG. Am I listening to a detective interview the acquaintance of a suspect???!!
I know that’s probably not the case, and there’s some logical explanation, but I am in full blown Benson mode right now geeking the hell out, physically leaning into their conversation with no shame as I type this. Could I be the one to solve the crime?? The older man needs my help!! I’ve already jumped to a dozen different conclusions. Best case scenario, this involves a serial killer, international drug ring and Donald Trump. Hey, a girl can dream.
I’m going to keep eavesdropping while I put together the rest of this post, and I’ll fill you in with an update at the end. Just humor me–I’m sure no one actually cares about the conversation I’m listening to in Starbucks (lol).
21-Minute Bodyweight Workout (AMRAP Pyramid)
This workout is broken up into four AMRAPs (as many rounds/reps as possible). You’ll set a timer for the given length (the first AMRAP is 6 minutes long; second is 5 minutes long; third is 4 minutes; last is only 3 minutes) and go through the following circuit of compound exercises as many times as you can in the given timeframe. Rest for 60 seconds in between AMRAPs and start the circuit wherever you left off at the end of the previous AMRAP. For clarity, here’s a breakdown of the workout structure:
rest 60 sec
rest 60 sec
rest 60 sec
10 Crossbody Push Ups | Start in a plank position with your feet a little wider than you’d normally place them for push ups. Do one push up. Back in your starting plank position, crunch your right knee into your left elbow then your left knee into your right elbow (like a crossbody mountain climber). Next, shoot your hips up into the air, pressing into your left hand (as if you were going into a down dog position) as you reach your right hand across your body to touch the left ankle. Bring the hand back to its starting position as you shift your body forward into plank and then shoot the hips right back up, this time pressing into your right hand as you reach your left hand across your body to touch the right ankle. Return to plank positon. That’s one rep.
10 Plank to Low Squat Jacks | Start in a plank position, hands stacked under shoulders. From here, you’re going to jump your feet forward, out a little wider than your hands, snapping up into a low squat position. There should be a split-second as your feet jump forward that neither hands or feet are touching the ground–so make this an explosive movement! From that wide low squat position, hop your feet together into a narrow squat and then back out wide (staying low in your squat the whole time). Bring your hands backdown to the floor as you jump your feet back to starting plank position. That’s one rep.
5 Rotating Crunches: Side V Up Right >> Full-Body Crunch >> Side V Up Left >> Full-Body Crunch |
Start laying on your right side, balancing on that bottom hip/side butt area with your bottom hand on the floor in front of you for support. Top arm is bent with hand behind your head and elbow out wide; legs should be extended and hovering off the ground. From here, you’re going to crunch up and in, keeping your legs straight as you lift your torso up and in to meet them so that your sidebody forms a “v” shape. Use that bottom hand for support, but try to push off it minimally. Slowly lower back down and extend back out to a hover. Next, roll onto your back (keeping your legs hovering) and extend your arms overhead. Do a full-body crunch, bending your knees in as you lift your torso off the floor, wrapping your arms around your knees. From this position balancing on your tailbone, extend back out, legs to a hover, arms overhead, and roll onto left side. Do a side v up on that side, roll back to center for a second full-body crunch. That’s one rep.
TIP: Set up your mat perpendicularly to your body so that if you were laying on your back, you and the mat would make a cross shape. This way as you roll side to side, you’ll have the mat under your hips the whole time.
Making a Starbucks Murderer Update: The younger man’s friend is interviewing for a federal job and the older man is just conducting a background check. WOMP WOMP WOMMMMMMP.